The Culture
September 21, 2016
Huddle Up
Why tailgating with my family and friends (and a million other fans) is my favorite part of college football.
324 Articles
The Texanist
August 24, 2016
Endless Summers
Welcome to Camp Honey Creek for girls, where the years tick by but time stands still.
The Texanist
July 20, 2016
A Man of Letters
Our estimable advice columnist answers this burning question: What’s it like to be the Texanist?
The Texanist
June 22, 2016
In Memoriam
What Jack Unruh meant to me.
The Texanist
May 23, 2016
The Texanist: Bidding Farewell to Supper and Complaining about Cold Tortillas
Our estimable advice columnist on saying “I do” to a potbellied pig, bidding farewell to supper, giving your regards to Texas, and complaining about cold tortillas.
The Texanist
April 20, 2016
The Texanist: Shouldn’t Fancy Restaurant Steaks Be Better Than Ones I Cook in My Own Backyard?
Forget about Batman vs. Superman. Our advice columnist referees spring vs. fall, Strait vs. Wills, Oatmeal vs. Bacon, and restaurant vs. patron.
The Texanist
March 23, 2016
The Texanist: Should I Get a License to Carry?
Our estimable advice columnist on firearms, weekend getaways, and how to properly eat a tamal.
The Texanist
February 24, 2016
The Texanist: Advice on Topo Chico and Old Pickups
Our estimable advice columnist on putting a Tennessean in his place, adding Topo Chico to everything, learning to love a rusty jalopy, and naming Possum Kingdom Lake.
The Texanist
January 27, 2016
The Texanist: Are We Still Texans if We’re Living Out of State?
Our estimable advice columnist on the pronunciation of “Fort Worth,” the pros and cons of spring break south of the border, the best way to deal with the brisket illiterate, and the Texan who mistook himself for a Floridian.
The Texanist
December 23, 2015
The Texanist: Is Not Liking Willie Nelson’s Music a Deal Breaker?
Our advice columnist muses on the seeming futility of horse apples, the finer points of knives, the downside of going vegetarian, and whether it’s possible to love a Willie-hater.
The Texanist
November 18, 2015
The Texanist: on the Sanctity of a Pickup Bed
Our advice columnist muses on the sanctity of a pickup’s bed, browses the Neiman Marcus Christmas Book, and once again tries to determine who qualifies as a Texan.
The Texanist
October 21, 2015
The Texanist: How to Pronounce Pecan
Our estimable advice columnist on the origins of Hunt’s boot fence and how miffed we should get about pecan pronunciation, desecrated chili pots, and overenthusiastic, football-lovin’ grandfathers.
The Texanist
September 17, 2015
The Texanist: How to Pick the Country Boy of Your Dreams Out of the Herd
Our estimable advice columnist on finding love in the country, the (unquestioned!) merit of the State Fair, the fulfilling post-rodeo career of a bucking bull, and more.
The Texanist
August 14, 2015
The Texanist: How Should a Texan Handle Himself in the Presence of a Small Stinging Insect?
Our estimable advice columnist on how to handle nasty bugs, tobacco-pushing grandpas, and red lights in a one-stoplight town.
The Texanist
July 23, 2015
The Texanist: What Should I Do if I Encounter a Tornado While Driving?
Our estimable advice columnist on ducking tornadoes, mom’s new boyfriend’s haircut, the politics of pro football, and the mysterious origins of the Texas sheet cake.
The Texanist
June 11, 2015
The Texanist: Which Texas Beaches Rival the Old South Padre Island?
Our estimable advice columnist on washed-up beaches, chicken-fried whoppers, the etymology of “hindcatcher,” and tryin’ to love an Elantra-drivin’ man.
The Texanist
May 13, 2015
The Texanist: Can You Explain Some Armadillo Lore?
Our estimable advice columnist on armadillo mortality, Dallas Cowboys etiquette, barbecue preferences, and a perfect Texas playlist.
The Texanist
April 16, 2015
The Texanist: Do I Need to Update My Jeans Style?
Our estimable advice columnist on hat etiquette, delusions of ranchhood, reconnecting with your Texas roots, and staying loyal to your Wranglers.
The Texanist
March 13, 2015
The Texanist: Will I Ever Get My Knife Back from Airport Security?
Our estimable advice columnist on pathological liars, missing knives, the difference between a Texan and a New Yorker turned Floridian turned Montanan, and why tequila is not—hic!—a vegetable.
The Texanist
February 10, 2015
The Texanist: Have Texans Forgotten How to Drive?
Our estimable advice columnist on Texas brag, the limits of speed limits, the intoxicating appeal of his alma mater, and just who, exactly, was going to Luckenbach, Texas, with Waylon and Willie.
The Texanist
January 14, 2015
The Texanist: How Can I Get My Girlfriend to Live With the Smell of Smoke From a Nearby Barbecue Joint?
Our estimable advice columnist on buildin’ a fire pit, dressin’ like an oilman, plannin’ a destination wedding (or not), and lettin’ go of a non-barbecue-lovin’ woman.
Arts & Entertainment
January 9, 2015
The Texanist, Special Reporter Edition
Advice for Tiger’s new swing coach.
The Texanist
December 11, 2014
The Texanist: More on the Texanist’s Miniature Sidekick
Our estimable advice columnist on deer blind etiquette, the undeniable friendliness of his fellow Texans, the ineffable charm of sounding like a rube, and his peculiar sidekick, Li’l Bubba.
The Texanist
November 14, 2014
The Texanist: The Recently Repatriated Texan Bucket List
Our estimable advice columnist on domino-nothings, reconnecting with your roots, procuring public property, and the ineffable appeal of the frozen mango margarita.
The Texanist
October 13, 2014
The Texanist: When Did We Start Calling the Chicken’s “Second Joint” the Thigh?
Our estimable advice columnist on poultry politesse, I-35 road rage, and a bedeviling place name.
The Texanist
September 15, 2014
The Texanist: Why Isn’t “Texan” an Acceptable Play in Words With Friends?
Our estimable advice columnist on playing Words With Friends, figuring out a hat size mystery, and the rules pertaining to road-killed rattlers.
The Texanist
August 8, 2014
The Texanist: Are the Banks of a Stream Free to Use for Camping?
Our estimable advice columnist on camping by a river, shooting by a river, choosing what heels to wear (not by a river), and more.
The Texanist
July 15, 2014
The Texanist: Is There “No Such Thing as Bad Barbecue”?
Our estimable advice columnist on bad barbecue vs. no barbecue, rodeo bullfighting, and dogs at bars.
Travel & Outdoors
July 10, 2014
Look What the Tide Dragged In
Mucking about on the Gulf Coast.
The Texanist
June 5, 2014
The Texanist: What Are Happening to Dining Traditions of Yore?
Our estimable advice columnist on bygone dining traditions, feeling homesick, and the indelible effects of living a mere five years in Texas.
The Texanist
May 9, 2014
The Texanist: Can a Non-Native Texan Teach Texas History?
Our estimable advice columnist on seventh-grade Texas history teachers, the ban on the can ban, sought-after stick sausages, and more.
Travel & Outdoors
May 1, 2014
Trip Guide: New Orleans
There is something wonderfully anachronistic about traveling by train in this modern age. And I’m not talking about workaday back-and-forth commuting on some dreary regional transit full of pallid stiffs. Quite the opposite: I mean real rail travel, travel the old-fashioned way—a weekend summer sojourn by way of a
Travel & Outdoors
April 16, 2014
A Summer Weekend: San Antonio to New Orleans
An extended Big Easy debauch by way of Amtrak’s Sunset Limited.
The Texanist
April 8, 2014
The Texanist: Does Anyone Actually Have a “Roll in the Hay”?
Our estimable advice columnist on euphemisms involving the word "hay," A&M's unaptly named yearbook, and meat preparation preferences.
The Texanist
March 19, 2014
The Texanist: Has Society Become Too Protective and Overly Litigious?
Our estimable advice columnist on equestrian liability, Texan genealogy, and Furr’s Fresh Buffet vs. Luby’s Cafeteria.
The Texanist
February 11, 2014
The Texanist: How Do I Break It to My Children That They Ate the Livestock “Pets”?
Our estimable advice columnist on how to talk to kids about edible pets, whether Plano is pretentious, what constitutes a “major” city, and more.
The Texanist
January 22, 2014
The Texanist: Can You Recommend a Cure for Cedar Fever?
Our estimable advice columnist on the best way to endure the cedar allergy season, the safety of mutton busting, how to impress your valentine this month, and more.
The Texanist
December 10, 2013
The Texanist: Should I Let My Teenaged Son Go on a Coed Camping Trip?
Our estimable advice columnist on when teenagers should be allowed to go on unchaperoned coed camping trips, whether Coloradans hate Texans, and more.
Recipes
November 20, 2013
Let’s Eat
Treasured recipes—and the stories behind them—from our staff.
Food & Drink
November 19, 2013
My Mother’s Kosher Dill Pickles (Made by Sammie Marshall)
The best pickles I have ever tasted came from my mother.
The Texanist
November 18, 2013
The Texanist: Do East Texas Purple Hull Peas Count as Good Luck on New Year’s?
Offering fine advice since 2007.
The Texanist
October 14, 2013
The Texanist: How Do a Husband and Wife Resolve Backyard Barbecuing Duties?
How do a husband and wife resolve backyard barbecuing duties? Illustration by Jack UnruhQ: My wife has recently taken a keen interest in my backyard barbecuing duties. In fact, last weekend she asked me if I wanted her to start cooking the beans from now
The Texanist
September 23, 2013
The Texanist
Offering fine advice since 2007.
Arts & Entertainment
August 15, 2013
On Sports and Sportsmanship
Q: I’ve had a tailgate party in the same spot for just about every Aggie home game since R. C. Slocum’s last season, in 2002. This year I’d like to make the move to a different spot, on the other side of the stadium, but it’s between two established tailgates, and I
The Texanist
August 15, 2013
On the Great Outdoors
Q. I am an avid South Texas hunter. A while back, I was en route to Concan and stopped to get gas when I saw a group of grown men shamelessly flaunting their pink camouflage hats and shirts. In almost three decades of hunting I have never seen a pink
The Texanist
August 15, 2013
On the Home and Lawn
Q: Will hiring a lawn service to do my mowing make me soft?Preston CulbersonNacogdochesSeptember 2009A: Well, boy hidy, Mr. Deep Pockets, seems somebody has suddenly found himself standing in some mighty high cotton. And, at the same time, in some increasingly tall grass. Did your numbers hit? Ol’ Aunt
The Texanist
August 15, 2013
On Child-Rearing
Q: My twelve-year-old daughter is a complete and unashamed tomboy. She hunts with me, fishes with me, and throws the football with me. Wouldn’t be caught dead in a dress. I love every second of it, but her mother thinks it’s come time for her to drop some of these boyish
The Texanist
August 14, 2013
On Dipping and Spitting
Q: I work for a technology company in a nice office in Austin—despite what you have heard, we are required to wear shoes. Anyway, I have a co-worker who dips Copenhagen and spits into a Styrofoam cup. Is this acceptable in an office environment? Mike Via e-mailSeptember 2007A: Though
The Texanist
August 14, 2013
On Romance
Q: How many Gulf oysters does it take for a person to see results from the aphrodisiac qualities that they are said to possess? My wife and I were recently visiting Galveston and shared three dozen to no avail.Name WithheldFebruary 2011A: Ah, the oyster. The most delectable and voluptuous of
The Texanist
August 14, 2013
On Beer, Tequila, and Other Libations
Q: If I go to a fiesta and take a twelve-pack of Lone Star with me and only drink eight, can I take the remaining brews home with me? John ValdezAustinApril 2008A: Experience tells the Texanist that even when one arrives at a party empty-handed, drinks